Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Why do some people have to be so mean?

I have no tolerance for insensitive, inconsiderate people. Or stupid people, for that matter. But not people of low intelligence. I mean STUPID people, the ones who don't have to be stupid, yet they chose to be or don't try not to be. But that's a whole other topic, which I'm sure I'll expound on in great detail at some other point in time. This rant, however, is just about those mean spirited individuals who don't know when to keep their goddamned mouths shut (or fingers off the keyboard, in this case). There was a post(s) on one of the threads at 3fc today (in the support forum, not my beloved 100 lb. club) that really just pissed me straight off. So much so that I actually responded to the poster and voiced my outrage, which is, of course, completely out of character for me. Said thread has since been removed, I'm assuming because it got even more catty after I left the site, but I'm not sure. Anyway, I wish I had saved it or something because I can't recall exactly what was said, but here's the gist of it. One woman posted about her food addiction and how the compulsive nature of her addiction led her to actually steal food from a co-worker out of the staff fridge. She was called on it and, of course, was completely mortified. The post in general was just looking for a little support from those who can relate and to voice her concern about how her addiction has affected her. There were some basic responses from people who didn't fully understand her addiction, giving suggestions like pack your own lunch so you won't be tempted to eat someone else's, and don't steal other people's food, etc. She then tried to explain the compulsive nature of her addiction and added that, of course, she understands that it's not right to steal, etc. So then, there's this post from another member stating basically that this whole addiction business is "hogwash" and to quit using that as an excuse to steal, or something like that. I know there was more that was pretty catty but I just can't remember. Plus I had just read another post by the same woman in a different thread stating that she was shocked at what the original poster in that thread had chosen for a goal weight because that was still so chunky! And she said some other catty stuff there as well. OMG! I was livid! So I wrote that until she had walked a mile in that woman's (the food addict) shoes, she had no right to pass judgment on her. And that addiction is NOT hogwash and not to be underestimated. I also said that this was my opinion and she was free to have her own, but that 3fc should be a "drama free zone" where people can give and receive support not judgment. And that there is a certain level of respect and compassion that we've come to expect from each other, and deserve no less. Well, that's not exactly what I said either, but it's close enough damnit! At any rate, it pissed me off enough to say something, and even though I may have been out of line in doing so, I feel completely justified in my response.


Anonymous Jilly said...

Wow, that's one thread I wish I'd seen before it was deleted (not only so I could throw in my two cents towards the idiot, but to lend some support to the original poster)! How brave of her to relate something so humiliating ~ the poor thing. She bared her soul in a desperate need for support (in the appropriate forum) and was so cruelly attacked. What on earth was the cruel one doing in a support forum if she had no intention of giving any??

I am so glad you expressed your outrage (firstly because I know your usual avoidance of conflict; secondly because its another step towards our Beverly not being afraid to let people know how she feels and thirdly because that poor compulsive eater deserved your support and understanding and was likely comforted by your words). NO WAY were you out of line for responding in that manner! I hope the cruel, insensitive one is banned from the site ~ we certainly don't need her kind around to poison it!

7:19 AM  
Blogger Dawnyal said...

I think you did the right thing by speaking up. I saw her response about the goal weight of the other poster being chunky but I guess I missed this post. I've noticed that when you venture away from the 100+ you do get a more "varied" group of responses. I hope the original poster is able to get some help and not let the one bad chick ruin it for her at 3fc.

12:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I know this is an old post, but holy cow, reading it brought back memories. I'd never dream of stealing anyone's food nowadays, but back in high school... well, I'm mortified to admit it, but I shared a locker with my brother (who didn't live at home -- long story) and I used to steal his lunch and eat it in the bathroom, then deny it when he would ask me. Poor guy -- he always had delicious food we never had like bologna and cheese sandwiches, potato chips, Twinkies. I, of course, never brought a lunch. I skipped breakfast and lunch because I was trying to lose weight. My poor misguided 15 year old self...

2:45 PM  

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