Ug, I must be PMSing because it’s around that time when my mood dips the most. Which really isn’t that bad now with my happy pills, but I still notice the difference just the same. BTW, a quick note on said happy pills, I discovered that they are now on that WalMart $4.00 drug list, so my happy pills have just made me even happier!! :D But I digress, I’m feeling blah, and I don’t like it! To tell the truth, as much as I love working from home and all of its fantastic advantages, I’m really just bored and burnt out. I can’t imagine doing this (particularly the telemarketing stuff) FOREVER. There’s just no way. But there honestly isn’t anything that I want to do, well, nothing that I can earn a living doing anyway, so here I am. I want to own a home, I want to have savings, I want to be able to take real vacations, and I want to enjoy real financial stability rather than just getting by. Granted, I can at least pay the bills on time now, and I am in control of my own finances, but now that I can count on that, I guess I just want more.

Em’s been grounded all week for hitting another little boy at school. She got sent to the principle’s office where she received a formal written warning that I had to sign and return. She has “issues” with controlling herself, especially when upset, and this kid is veeeeery easily upset. She’s extremely particular and likes things to be a certain way (usually her way), so when they’re not, well, Katie bar the door! She’s quite introspective too though; she’s actually said to me (after one of her “incidents” that she must get her volatile personality form Bub. So perhaps there’s hope for her yet, as she can actually recognize some of her more undesirable personality traits and relate them to how they affect her actions. If only we all could be so intuitive. Yep, if she can just get through her childhood without committing a felony, I think she’s gonna turn out all right!

My mom just reminded me that my birthday is coming soon. I guess I knew it was coming, but I didn’t realize how close it was. I’ll be 30 on March 3, the big 3-Oh. I wonder if I should do something to celebrate this milestone? I’m not big on parties or spending money on myself for that matter, but perhaps a little something special would be nice. I dunno, I’ll think about it, I still have a little time. Bub has already told me what he’s doing for his birthday. Apparently he’s going to rent a party room in some bar in Little Rock and invite all of his freaky-ass friends for a rockin good time. He also just bought himself a new 40 in. LCD TV from a rent to own place. $2400.00 for the TV, but $5400.00 in all due to exuberant rent to own finance charges. I guess he figures he can afford it now that Jim has asked him to stay on, and because his dad has opted to pay off the loan that we took in their name by taking out an even larger loan and keeping the balance for he and Bub’s mom to use for themselves. This is the loan that Bub got them to take out for us when his last business failed so that we could afford to live until he found another job. And the one I’ve continued to pay my share of since I left. So even though it’s great for me (no more $115.00 payment per month) his dad is royally screwing himself. But he’s stubborn and has his mind made up to do this, so that’s that. Sometimes I wonder what Bub and I ever saw in each other, as we couldn’t possibly be more different. He sees the extra money as just more to blow; I see it as a way to start some savings. He sees renting to own a 40 freakin’ inch TV as an acceptable way to purchase unnecessary luxuries when you have shitty credit. I’m of the mind that if you can’t afford to buy something like that, then you save up until you can. Or at least use a credit card with a reasonable APR and try to pay it off as quickly as possible. But if your credit is so bad that you can’t even get a credit card with a reasonable APR, and more than a $300 limit, then don’tcha think you ought not be buying a 40 FREAKIN INCH TV??!!

Okay, I’m done. As I like to continuously remind myself; this kind of ridiculous crap is no longer my problem. Thank goodness!! Anyway, that’s about all I can muster for now. I feel grumpy so I’m gonna go sulk and be thankful that I had the presence of mind to pawn the M&M jar off on Bub when I did. Otherwise, well… let’s not go there, shall we? ;D