Tuesday, September 13, 2005

I hate titles, how about "just stuff"?!

Damn it! I allowed myself to become engrossed in one of the 9/11 documentaries while channel surfing Sunday night. And as I sat there with tears streaming down my face, I kept thinking, "why do I do this to myself?" I know how it's gonna affect me, yet I re-live it anyway, why? It's like that scene in Steel Magnolias where the women have gathered just after the funeral and they run the gamete of emotions from desperate rage to belly aching laughter. And I know that each and every time I watch it, I'm gonna end up doing the ugly cry whether I like it or not, and more often than not, end up with a horrible headache. So what do I do when I catch it on TV? I sit there and watch the whole damn thing, cry my eyes out, pop some Excedrin and try to make it through the rest of my day without blubbering like a total idiot again. Oy vei!

I had a horrible headache Monday. I seem to go through stretches now where they last for several days in a row and then I'm fine for a while. This is such a vast difference from before the weight loss, when practically every day was filled with pain. Now the severity is not as bad, nor do they last as long. But, when they do occur, it still sucks monkey butt!! Oh well, at least I was able to get in my morning stint on the Gazelle before it got too bad, and it did subside later that day, only to show back up again this morning, but not nearly as bad.

Em got her birthday thank you cards written and were mailed off Monday. I love how she put a personal message specifically about the gift(s) she received in each one, and even drew a few pictures to illustrate her immense pleasure with her gifts. She is such a creative little girl, and will almost never pass up the opportunity to draw a pretty picture for a loved one. I suspect she's on her way to becoming quite a talented little artist since her ability is already so apparent. Of course, I'm not at all biased about the artistic abilities of my genius only child, now am I?? tee hee! ;)

We were not able to tackle the mountain of toys in her room that need to be sorted and sent off to Goodwill like I wanted to this weekend. Em has been such a little social butterfly lately with the birthday parties of friends and the seemingly endless playdates with the girls down the street. But I really don't mind, I love that she has friends to play with now. She seemed to be getting so lonely and bored, and now she totally lights up whenever they show up to play. It really warms my heart since I've been stressing lately about her being an only child and not having other kids around to play with. I also love that she's found some friends with more acceptable social skills. I've mentioned before about the two sisters (the ones who are home schooled and had such a miserable birthday party in July) who came over to play every Wednesday this summer. Well, I believe that because of their sheltered environment and, dare I say, neglectful care, their social skills and understanding of appropriate behavior leave much to be desired. Unfortunately, they've been over-sexualized at some point, and while I don't suspect abuse, I do believe that appropriate boundaries regarding sexuality have never been enforced. So, when they "play Bratz" with Emmy, their games are often centered around inappropriate contact between the male and female dolls. Now, I'm fully aware that play-acting in this way is completely normal, I know I had my own Barbies gettin busy as a child, but these girls tend to take it entirely too far. So much so in fact, that Emmy confided in me how uncomfortable it made her feel and had to ask me several questions to clarify what she had witnessed. Anyway, after much discussion, I decided to leave it up to her whether she continue to play with them or not since I am completely confidant in her willingness to come to me with problems or questions regarding their behavior, which she has done on numerous occasions. However, I did tell her that if the behavior continued, I would have to intervene regardless of how well she was handling it, and she promised to tell me if she wasn't able to get them to stop. Apparently she took care of bidness because when I questioned her again she explained that they changed their tune real quick when she told them she wouldn't let them come over to play on Wednesdays anymore if they didn't. She also told them they weren't allowed to curse around her anymore, since they apparently did so frequently. You go Em, that's my girl!! So... the point I was meaning to make is that Em is very pleased that these new playmates of hers like to play just like she does, and she's never had to deal with them crossing the line in their play-acting with the Bratz. In fact she seemed relieved and kind of surprised at her new friends' apparent normalcy, almost like she'd forgotten that kids can just play without all that uncomfortable ickyness. She's been able to relax her vigilant drill sergeant routine, and just have some fun! Yay!!

Oh! An update on my Grandma, SHE'S HOME!! Her doc says they're gonna wait on any surgeries she may need until she's had a chance to regain her strength, and he's allowing her to do so at home! I knew they wouldn't be able to get her in some nursing home, those are for old people!! Not spry, 87 year old, dirty joke tellin, young'uns like her! Double yay!!


Blogger Dawnyal said...

You go Em. That is great that 1) she came to you about it and 2) was able to handle the problem of the girls by herself. The total lack of parenting today in some people just annoys the heck out of me.

You said earlier you worry about not being a good role model. Hello? how many kids you know nowadays right out thank you letters? I can count on one finger the one I know and it's a coworker's daughter. :)

It's nice to know my Ken and Barbie weren't the only ones getting some action, although I had a Donnie doll as well (as in Donnie and Marie :D).

2:35 PM  
Anonymous Jilly said...

Ugh, migraine headaches! I used to suffer from them terribly and they seemed to be either related to hormones (during PMS) or the weather (humidity and change in barometric pressure). I could predict thunderstorms by my throbbing head. I know how hot and humid it is in Arkansas, you poor thing, but do they lessen after the worst of summer is over? The only thing that ever worked for me was a prescription drug called Imitrex that you took before the onset of the actual migraine (you know, when you're experiencing the "aura"). Regular pain killers didn't do anything for the pain, but they would make me lose the contents of my stomach (which, for some reason, would lesson the throbbing). Anyway, I found after menopause the headaches decreased greatly, so that's something to look forward to (even though its eons away for you).

I'm at a loss as to how young childen get sexualized so early! I can only think its exposure to television, movies and such (I don't even want to think they're actually seeing that at home). Thankfully you and Em can discuss these matters rationally and she has a full understanding of what is and is not appropriate. Yep, she's a bright little thing, for sure!

12:22 PM  

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