Hmmmm, where shall I even begin? It seems that I have so little free time now, but I guess that's only because I've been spoiled to soooooo much free time thus far. It's been an adjustment to say the least. And I feel a bit guilty for not updating more often... I hate to let people down. I know I'm doing this (blogging) for me, but I've gotten quite used to having ya'll out there cheering me on, and I'm afraid that my lack in posting will bore you away. So thank you for sticking with me and I hope you'll continue to do so. Now, let's see here, this week we've had Em's best friend Sheree stay with us for four days and three nights. Her mom was going out of town to "get away" for a while and asked if I could take Sheree while she was gone. Um, okaaaay? I can count the number of times we've actually spoken on one hand, and you want me to just take your kid for damn near a week? Sure, why the hell not?! Humph, now that was an experience! My bright, lovely, talented, only daughter is the epitome of the only child syndrome, and simply has no use for compromise, sharing, and tolerance. I thought they might just kill each other by day three, and if they hadn't, I might have. No really, muzzles would have come in handy. But I was good, and no one ended up bound and duck tapped, though that's not to say that I didn't at least entertain the idea. Hey, only once or twice... I swear! Anyway, I was worried about my ability to maintain an acceptably quiet work environment with two prepubescent girls in the house, but I have to say, they did exceptionally well considering their age and level of self control. I was pleasantly surprised and at least Em had a bit more to keep her occupied than she did the week before. But we were still very happy to finally send Sheree home, and get back to our normal, quiet existence.

Em spent much of the week in a "I love my daddy, he's nice." phase. Hmmmm, no coincidence that he footed the bill for a fun filled day last weekend, planned another for this weekend, and has been buying her stuff, huh? It's so funny to hear her when she's like this too, like she's trying to convince herself rather than just stating her feelings. She so desperately wishes she had a normal, nice daddy, that she thinks if she says it aloud enough, that it might just come true. But the moment she feels even the slightest hint of him being his old self, she goes right back to "he's meeeeeeean!" and automatically clings to me for security and reassurance of her reality. My poor girl, how I wish she didn't have to go through such confusing crap in her young life.

Work is still going well. I did have a concern this week though, as one of their contracts was slow coming through and the project I was scheduled to begin working on (on Friday) was delayed. Which meant that I was left with nothing to do, and subsequently would not be paid for that day. Well now, hold on just a damn minute! No one said that was part of the deal! I was/am under the impression that I should expect steady work, not just some here and there whenever it's available. But being new, I had no way of knowing how typical this lack of work might be, so by golly, I asked them! I certainly didn't want to continue counting on something only to have it fall out from under me. Anyway, I asked, in the most polite and tactful way I could, and their response was that this was not typical, but it does occur from time to time. But due to my excellent work for them thus far, I would be first in line (behind their #1, long time employee) to receive any extra work or be assigned new projects. And true to their word, one of my bosses called Friday morning asking if I could take over work on a different project that day. So okay, I feel a little more secure now, but I've got my eye on it and plan to keep my guard up for at least the first six months until their track record can be proven.

So get this, Bub asked me if I thought our doing stuff all together might be sending the wrong message to Em, like making her think there's some chance of us getting back together. He just now thinks of this, and of course, assumes that I couldn't possibly have thought of it myself already. Um, no dude, she totally gets it, and has no desire for that to happen. But how to convey that to this clueless man without letting on that his daughter would really prefer not to spend any time alone with him? I dodged around the obvious and alluded to the fact that she and I have discussed it and that he need not worry his poor wittle head. Then, somehow, this conversation turned into one of dating and/or marriage on either of our parts in the future. He figures he'll get married again some day, (poor woman) and I can only assume he must be smoking some pretty stout crack. Or else he plans to peruse the high schools, cause there ain't a grown ass woman alive (well, other than me apparently) who would willing try to mold herself into his ideal mate. No, he needs them young and naive, (stupid) like how he suckered me. Fresh meat, y'know? An empty palate to mold and create. Maybe he'll have better luck with the next one and she won't wise up like I did. After all, I've given him ample opportunity to learn from his previous wife rearing mistakes, and he can only get better from here. Anyway, if there is such a woman up to the challenge? Well, she obviously deserves him. Okay, that was harsh. No one really deserves him. Best of luck buddy.

In other news, my night time snacking has spun out of control, literally. This from the person who couldn't imagine ever going back to that secretive, binge filled way of thinking and life? Yup, she's there. And it's soooooo goddamned easy too. Right freakin' there, almost in an instant, and I can't seem to make myself stop. Why? Must I have something, some sort of drama to sustain me and focus my energy on? WTF? I spent all that time changing my body and mindset, then I set out to change my ever fucking life by facing fears that I honestly never thought I could or would. And now that that's over with... what? I couldn't be happy to settle comfortably into my new life? Noooooo, I gotta start letting the fat girl take over again so I can have something to focus on, don't I? What a crock. I need to get a fucking grip and get over myself already. This is not how I intend to go down, not as some pathetic statistic of how likely it is to regain lost weight. I don't get to be one of those girls who can loosen up and let her hair down when it comes to diet and exercise. I need structure and consistency, or I fall flat on my face, apparently into a big heaping bowl of goddamned cereal! And no, it's not the evil Kashi, that was banned long ago. Apparently now, I can't have any kind of cereal near me, unless it's some kind of fruity shit that I'm so grateful Em will tolerate for my sake. What is up with me? I just don't get it. But I do know one thing, it has got to stop, period. I said I was going back to basics a couple of weeks ago, and I did. But then the crap started to creep back in, and well... you know how it goes. So today I refocus and start anew. No more letting myself get away with this shit, cause really, the only one I'm hurting is myself, and it's just plain ridiculous. Never trade what you want at the moment for what you want the most...

Wow, what a week!

Whew, glad that's over! Well, I started my new (second) job this week. As I mentioned, it's telephone work from home gathering information from hospitals, clinics, and doctor's offices, etc. to determine interest in various client's products and services; primarily high end/high tech medical equipment. It's very easy work and quite boring, but it pays extremely well considering, so I won't complain (too much!) Anyway, it's been an adjustment, especially in terms of time management, but think it will work out as I'm slowly settling into more of a routine. As expected, Em has experienced some difficulty adjusting to much less of her mommy's undivided attention, but she's been a real trooper and her cooperation and understanding has been greatly appreciated, which I've made sure to compliment her on quite often.

Speaking of compliments, excuse me while I brag for just a moment, but I must share the fabulous email I received from my new boss on Friday, as it left me cheesing big time for much of the morning.

Titled: Okay, I give up!

Beverly,I can't find a single thing to find fault with in your work for yesterday. You hit 4.0 completions per hour, all your data fields are filled in, your spelling is impeccable, and your comments are detailed and exactly what we need. Are you sure you haven't worked for us before?

Seriously, great job!
Paul

Not only that, but he also sent a message to all of my co-workers expressing his desire to have them emulate my particular style of resolving the data we gather, making sure to point out how new I was to the job. Oy vey! You know they're all thinking, "That brown-nosing bitch!" Oh well, one good thing about working from home is that I never have to deal with office politics or drama, whew!

Now, on to other things, namely the big meeting between Mellany (Em's counselor) and Bub. Ha, what a joke! As expected, he poured on the charm, or rather, some semblance of normalcy, (which for him, is charm) and tried with all his might to sound like the concerned, loving super dad that he fancies himself to be. And she saw straight fucking through him! Ahhhh, the validation, what a spectacular thing!! He did most of the talking, of course (as if I even needed to say it). She told me later that she suspects that he typically does most of the talking in any room he happens to be gracing with his presence (uhhh, yuh!) and that she had a very strong, almost overwhelming feeling of me being pushed down or stifled the whole time we were together (double yuh!) He was very clever in the way he almost unwittingly made offhanded comments directed at my (many) faults and weaknesses as a person/wife/and mother, which, to a less attuned or untrained individual would surely have been taken as fact rather than for the narcissistic opinions that I believe them to be. I can only imagine what he's told his friends and family, and what they surely must think of me, knowing that they would have taken his word of my cold hearted mistreatment of him as gold, but I digress. The point of the matter is that he's been appeased, (meaning he doesn't think she's a total quack, and sees fit to allow her to continue counseling our daughter for the time being) and I'll hopefully have a bit of a break before he starts harping on whatever his next gripe will be. And believe me, there will be. Anyway, Em had her own appointment with Mellany the next day (Wed.) at which time my thoughts from my previous post were confirmed. Mellany informed me that in her opinion, Em would really prefer to have nothing to do with Bub, and would be perfectly happy if she didn't have to spend any time alone with him at all. She even probed Em's more recent desire to only plan outings with all of us together, thinking that perhaps there were some intent to reform her broken family. But that thought was quickly squelched by Em's adamant assertion that she does not want us back together again, and wouldn't even entertain the idea of pretending it were so, even for just a moment, as Mellany asked her to. No, it's quite clear that she simply prefers this scenario because it makes her feel more comfortable to have me near by. So if that's what she needs right now, then so be it. I can tolerate his idiocy (after all, I did it for almost 11 years) if it means that my daughter can feel safe and happy while with him. Hopefully this need will fade with time, but if not, I'll manage. Because, no matter what, I can at least take comfort in the fact that at the end of the day he must go his way, we get to go ours, and once again all will be right with the world.

A few thoughts, and a little news.

I really think Em would prefer not to be around Bub at all, at least not without me present. And that if he were to ever just fade away, she'd probably be perfectly fine with it (I know I sure would!!) Now that the novelty of fun daddy has worn off and she realizes that he is essentially still the same asshole he always was, she really doesn't want to have much to do with him anymore (really though, who could blame her?). She doesn't want to spend any time at his house, preferring instead to have him visit her here (oh goody, yay for me!), and she hasn't wanted to spend the night with him at all lately. Well, I take that back, she thought she did once after we got back from CA, but she changed her mind at about 11:30 that night and called me to come take her home saying she was homesick and missed me. And she hasn't wanted to again since. She was supposed to spend the day with him Saturday (giving me a much needed mommy break) but she chickened out at the last minute and begged me to allow her to change the plans so that we could all do something together rather than her having to spend the day alone with him. *Just a quick note here, none of this is under the quise of her trying to get us to reconcile. She has made it abundantly clear that she much prefers our new life now that she doesn't have to deal with him on a daily basis. She simply doesn't want to be alone with him and feels much better when I'm there to protect and comfort her when he's being himself. So instead, we all ended up going to the dollar theater together to see The Wild, (cute, but YAAAAAWN) then we went over to the mall where Em got a mini Bub lecture on her behavior, but nothing we couldn't handle. Then we stopped in at one of the stores that we always like to go to where they have this big hermit crab collection for sale. Em has always been fascinated by these creepy crawly things in brightly colored painted shells, wishing she, herself could take one home for her own. Knowing this, I had previously (secretly) purchased a hermit crab tank with all the fixins (rocks, food, etc.) at a yard sale with the intention on getting her a hermit crab when the time was right. Well... Bub apparently thought that time was now because he asked what I thought about him getting her one. I told him that I already had the stuff and had been planning on getting her one myself. Ohhh, but you took the fish tank, he whined. You know I want her to have a pet a my house too, and it's not fair if you get both (blah blah blah, whaaaaa!) OMG, whatever! Sure, fine, you get it for her. All that matters is that she has one, not who buys it for her (ya big freakin' baby!). Then he starts acting all concerned (bullshit) saying are you sure you're okay with it? Well no, I'm disappointed, but oh well. Guess that was sufficient enough cause he got her not one, but two creepy little monsters. Now, this was all with the understanding that they would be kept at Bub's house, her pets, but they would reside with him. Yeah, well that didn't even last through the ride home. Once Em started reading the care instructions and he realized just how big of a responsibility they were going to be, he changed his tune real quick. Oh, maybe you should keep them at your house, I just don't think I would remember to feed them when I'm supposed to, I wouldn't want them to die or anything. Good lord, is it really so much trouble to feed them and bathe them and make sure their needs are met? Apparently so. Really though, what did I expect? He never could manage to do those things with any of the pets we've ever had, or even our own daughter for that matter, so why would it be any different now? Anyway, Hermie and Sunshine now reside here, and the fish tank will soon be making it's way to Bub's house, in an effort to be fair. (rolls eyes)

My SIL came to town with my niece and nephews in tow on Friday to help me with getting my car worked on. I can't remember if I mentioned it or not, but she accidentaly backed her van into mine during our 4th. of July BBQ at their house. We weren't in the car, and no one was hurt, but it did leave a (small) dent, and she was completely mortified. Poor thing, she's still kicking herself for that one. Anyway, I thought the incident was more humorous than anything, telling her not to even worry about it as the dent was absolutely no big deal and certainly didn't need repair. But she wouldn't hear of it, and neither would my brother. They insisted on getting it fixed no matter how much fuss I put up about it. Okay fine! So I begrudgingly went and got an estimate for, get this... $786.54! Oh come on already! There was no way I was gonna let them take care of almost 800 bucks worth of repair, insurance or not! But at least the shop I took it to was able to refer me to someone who specializes in these kind of little dings and dents for a mere fraction of the cost. So my SIL met me at the shop and we got it all taken care of in just a few hours for the much more reasonable price of $85.00. Now that's what I'm talkin bout! Anyway, while they were working out the kinks, SIL wanted to go shopping. Apparently just paying for the repairs wasn't enough to clear her guilty conscience. Oh nooooo, she thought a little retail therapy was highly in order, so she decided to buy Em some new clothes. Oy vey! I protested, of course, but yet again, she wouldn't hear of it, so I relented and allowed her to pick up a few things that Em liked from the clearance racks at WalMart. I think that finally made her happy... but we'll see! Gee, what if she had done some real damage? I could've got all of Em's back to school supplies taken care of, DAMN! ;D

And now, some news. Looks like I've got myself a second job. That telephone work I mentioned has come through, and I'm supposed to start training for it Monday at 9:00 am. I'm having major butterflies and second thoughts. I'm not completely certain I can handle the extra hours, especially now while Em's out for Summer break. But I'm gonna give it my best shot and hope that it works out. I really need the money, but... well, it's change dammit! And we all know how much I adore change. Plus, I have sooooo much freedom with my current job. Pretty much, as long as I make sure the church ladies are happy and taken care of, I can come and go and do as I please. But this second job requires a commitment of so many hours of phone time a day, to be completed at my discretion as long as it's during normal working hours. Luckily, my current job is so laid back that I can take on this type of commitment, but it's the loss of my free time that has me so worried. I mean, as it stands right now, Em pretty much has my attention most of the time. She understands that I do work, and that she has to be quiet while I'm on the phone, but for the most part, we can do what we please throughout the day. Now... I dunno? I'm worried that it won't be fair to her that she has to be stuck here being extra quiet for so much more of the day. I'm worried that I should have waited until school starts before pursuing additional income. But since the opportunity arose, I couldn't justify passing it up. I'm worried about finding the time for exercise and personal interests (like my blog and those of others). And I'm worried that I'll end up not performing up to my own expectations as well as those of my bosses while trying to juggle two separate jobs. Basically, I'm just worried... about everything. But what else is new, right? Anyway, this should be interesting to say the least. So wish me luck, I'm gonna need it!

Just stuff

So I'm having some issues lately. I binged last week. No good reason either, as if there ever were one. And this wasn't some piddly cauliflower binge either, this was a full on, candy/sweets/sugar/carbs/fats B-I-N-G-E. The likes of which I haven't partaken in for years. Sure, I've had other moments of weakness along the way, but honestly, nothing like this. It was sickening, and I was sickened by it both physically and mentally. Perhaps I just needed to get one last good one out of my system before I could truly regain the slowly dwindling control I've been losing over the last several months. Or perhaps I just wanted to gorge myself of chocolate, peanut butter, sweet bready carbs, and candy. Who knows, but I did it. And what's worse is that I knew what I was doing every step of the way. I knew it, and I allowed it anyway. The scale is most definitely up, uncomfortably so, and I'm wondering just what the hell I think I'm doing. I know better than this.

I took Em and her best friend Sheree to the park last week. They played and giggled and made believe... until a boy showed up, and then the silly immature playtime was apparently over. No, it was all about impressing this stupid little boy and trying to act older than her years. Like any mom, I wish she weren't in such a hurry to grow up. I happen to know what awaits her... maybe we could trade? ;D But then this little boy's bully of a brother (about 12?) showed up, they fought and wrestled some, just enough to piss the bully off and invoke his embarrassed and righteous retaliation. He walked off, and came back with a massive rock. He yielded it above his head, just daring his brother to provoke him further so that he may have reason to inflict more severe damage. My girl, feeling so cocky and sure of her suddenly more mature self, spouted off to the bully that he'd better stay away from her and her friend. So the bully turned to threaten her with the rock instead. She walked away, he followed... as did I. Mommy mode took over. I hunched over the little prick, wagged my finger at him and told him in no uncertain terms that he would not bully and intimidate other kids at the park, or anywhere else for that matter. And that I didn't care what he does at his own house, but he wasn't gonna do it here, and not to MY KID! I told him to take his butt home to his momma, and let her deal with his bullying ways! I know, definitely not my style, but dammit, who the hell did he think he was? Stupid boys, they're stinky and mean, the whole lot of them! ;D Anyway, he calmed down after that, and kept an eye keenly focused on me for the remainder of our stay. I can only imagine he was quite unsure of just what this pissed off momma might be capable of if he ventured to step even his pinky toe out of line again. Good, serves him right!

Okay, so get this. Bub actually had the audacity to ask me if there were any apartments available in my complex. And then, oh by the way, asked if I would be okay with him living mere steps away. Would I be okay with that?! Are you fucking kidding me? Idiot. I told him (with great difficulty- you know me, always trying to avoid conflict) that no, I would not be comfortable with that. He got pissy of course, probably wishing he'd never bothered to ask my opinion. But he didn't press the issue, thank goodness, and neither did I. He's realized that he needs to downsize as his complete lack of money management skills are beginning to bite him in the ass. But have no fear, he's been able to keep up his $35.00 Blockbuster online movie account so that he can continue to receive his beloved movies in the mail. Never mind the life insurance (only $10 more) that he let lapse, y'know, the one that would benefit his daughter when/if his horrendous lifestyle inevitably catches up with him. Sorry, the cynicism took over briefly, but I'm better now. He's also having a hissy about being out of the loop with regards to Em's counseling. He says her attitude is getting worse (no, she just feels safer expressing herself to him now) and he doesn't see how the counseling is doing her any good. He wants to know what's the point of going if it's not fixing anything (meaning her attitude and behavior issues). Ummmm, because it makes her feel better?? Double idiot. He just couldn't grasp the concept. So he's insisting on meeting with the counselor just so that she would have a clear understanding of what "we" expect from her work with our daughter. Whatever dude. Anyway, I scheduled it with Mellany (Em's counselor) and she's looking forward to finally meeting Bub. She knows what to expect from him and she says she's up to the challenge. Glad somebody is.

I'm looking at a new (secondary) job prospect. Not foregoing my little biz idea, just being realistic about the need for reliable extra income. Nothing's for sure yet, but I'll let ya'll know if anything comes of it. Anyway, it's telephone work (from home) which I seem to be suited for, and pretty darn good at, if I might add! It's funny, I can talk to total strangers all day long with ease, but when it comes to anything personal, I close up tight. I'm getting better though, I'm finally able to really talk to my mom (about real stuff, not just about fluff) and I've taken to doing so quite often lately. I'm so grateful for her, I don't know what I'd do without her.

Anyway, I'm at a weird place in my head right now, which I'm sure is quite apparent. But it'll pass, always does. BTW, I'm gonna be taking down my old blog, y'know, the one that is linking here? So, if you haven't already saved this new address, please do so as the other will be deleted sometime this week.

TTFN!

Finally, details and pics!

Good grief, I've been working on this damn post all freakin' week! I'm sure you're thinking c'mon already, we want details!! Okay, okay, here goes... ;D

Disneyland and California Adventure Park were awesome! Here's a pic of the view from our hotel room which overlooked California Adventure park (the two parks are right next to each other). Can't beat that for a view, huh? It was amazing and seeing it again only reminds me of my immense gratitude for being afforded this incredible opportunity. Em is now, officially, the roller coaster queen! Which is incredible all on it's own knowing her intense fear of heights and of the unknown. But she was a real trooper, trying things I never thought she would, and being so darn brave! Can ya tell I was proud?! We also went on our very first upsidedown roller coaster too. Yes, we, meaning I've never been on one that goes upsidedown either, and for good reason I might add! The thought scars the shit outta me! But since she was being so brave I figured I could do it too. WTF was I thinking?! But I couldn't get showed up by an 8 year old, now could I? Seriously though, it wasn't that bad. In fact, the upsidedown part wasn't nearly as unbearable as I'd envisioned it to be. Quite smooth actually, and really no big deal. What really got me were the ups and downs and intense drops, but hey, at least I tried it, and now I know what to expect so I can quit being such a freakin' fraidy cat all the time! Jilly, Sandi, I'm sure you recall my reaction to the idea of riding those stupid swings at Navy Pier. But I did it, white knuckles and all. And now this, yup, I'd say that's progress! Anyway, here's a few more pics, just cause.

That giraffe is made of freakin' Legos if you can believe it! Simply amazing!

And the one with Goofy is from the hotel lobby. These others are from the hotel as well, they had characters at breakfast each morning. I didn't really think to take any pics from inside the parks, as we were so darn busy and it just never occurred to me.


Just a side note here; Em almost immediately latched on to my stepdad- Grandpa Mark. She was verrrrry taken with him. Wanting only to hold his hand or sit by him where ever we went. Which seemed to suit him just fine! I certainly couldn't blame her though, I mean wow, a father figure who doesn't yell, get impatient, or make her feel incomplete or never quite good enough. One who pays real attention to her and makes her feel special because she is, not because he has own agenda. Gee, isn't that every little girl's dream? In fact, at one point, she pulled me aside to say that whe wants Grandpa Mark to be her daddy, and that I should marry him. Oy vey! It took some convincing before she finally accepted that her genius master plan was simply not an option.

Anyway, after a few exhausting days of riding rides and not seeing near all that the magical kingdom has to offer (is that even possible?) we flew back home to the Bay Area. But not before sharing a wonderful meal with my cousin and her SO, who just so happen to live in the area. We went to a fantastic BBQ place where Em ordered ribs and ended up looking like this:

Saturday was spent recuperating from all the excitement and visiting with family. We hooked up with my lovely Aunt Sandy and my youngest cousin for a lunch date with my grandma (the dirty jokester). It was a very nice time except for my grandma's yappy little dog who scared the crap outta Em. Sunday was a fabulous day spent out on the bay in Grandpa Mark's boat, where Em discovered her need for speed as he allowed her to motor in the clear, open waters. (pics, hopefully, soon to come!) Yowsa, what are the teen years gonna be like when she discovers driving?! Let's not go there, shall we? Monday was yet another action packed day spent at the cool, foggy beach in Half Moon Bay with just Em and I and Grandma Jan, (my mom) as Grandpa Mark's vacation time was spent and needed to get back to work. Now, just so you know, these are chilly beaches, not for sun worshipers, so I assumed that Em would merely wet her feet in the too cold for swimming waters, thus only thinking to throw a pair of sweats into our bag for her as an afterthought. So what do I get for ass-u-me-ing you ask? A soaked through, wet sand covered, cold little girl without a sufficient change of clothes, that's what! Luckily, there just happened to be an extra pair of her panties in the bag, so she was able to change into those and the sweats, and just had to wear her light jacket over a bear chest on the way back. Oy vey! BTW, she's not freaking out in the pic, she's just pretending the waves are chasing her and trying to swallow her whole. And the hooded lady there with her is the one and only, Grandma Jan.

Tuesday was an incredible tour of PIXAR with Grandpa Mark, and Grandma Jan too, of course. I have to say, I expected this place to be amazing, but quite honestly, it blew me away! The creative geniuses who work there, and their imaginative sense of fun and style, (most evidently seen through the decoration of their whimsical offices) was unlike anything I've ever encountered. Unfortunately, Em developed some tummy problems, so we cut the tour a bit short and headed back home for a little R&R. Wednesday was going to be spent in San Francisco and Pier 39, but we decided to reschedule due to Em's still uneasy tummy. So Wednesday and Thursday were more quietly spent hanging about the house. So I took the opportunity to enjoy a little nostalgia by walking over to my old elementary school where we played on the playground and soaked up yet more of the beautiful weather. And we also went to see Cars one evening, which the previous day's PIXAR tour only made that much better. Seriously, this place is amazing! I'd love to tell you more, but then I'd have to kill ya- verrrrry top secret! Shhhhhhh! ;D The above pic is from the lobby, and the only one I was technically "allowed" to take as stated by various signs posted throughout the facility.

Anyway, Friday ended up being the San Fran day with Grandma Jan, Aunt Sandy and two of my cousins. Grandpa Mark met up with us at Pier 39 later in the day after knocking off early. It was a gorgeous day and we were generously treated to some actual sunshine, which is quite a rarity out on the pier. Just get a load of the bright blue sky, WOW! (BTW, that's me there with Em, for those who've not yet actually seen me. Still not too big on having my picture taken, and tend to avoid it at all costs, but here ya go.) We did a lot of walking and shopping and managed to catch the act of a street performer doing his juggling thang. We also made sure to stop in at one of my favorite childhood fat girl stores; Chocolate Heaven (need I elaborate? The name says it all). And I even found an insanely cheap souvenir shop up on the second level, where Em and I loaded up on a whole lotta useless touristy crap. Later that night, it being my uncle's actual birthday, although a planned celebration wasn't scheduled until the following day, we all went out for the most fru fru dining experience I've ever encountered. You know the type, where each dish looks more like a piece of art rather than the delicious meal that it just so happens to be. I have to say, it was kinda cool. Not my typical fare, of course, but an awesome experience just the same.

Saturday, we went to a local farmer's market to gather fixin's for the salad we intended to bring to my uncle's big 60th. b-day party. Then we checked out some new, local model homes. You know, where they decorate to the nines and open them up to the public for viewing in the hopes of selling. No reason for looking, we've just always liked doing it. And lemme tell ya, these things were ridiculous; well over a million dollars, dinky bedrooms with tiny closets and almost no backyards to speak of, aaaaaaand within spittin' distance of the train tracks to boot! I mean c'mon people, a million freakin' bucks?! You've got to be kidding me! After that, we picked up a few more things from the grocery store, including a lottery ticket and a few scratch offs. Awwww, you know I couldn't resist! No luck, of course, but I just had to try! Then we headed over to my Aunt and Uncle's house for the big party. My Grandma made lasagna; best damn lasagna I've ever tasted too, and no secret why my uncle requested it! And Em made it her mission to be the life of the party, which is just the way she likes it; all eyes on her (as long as she's comfortable with the company that is). Those pics hopefully soon to come as well. Anyway, we stayed too late, but it was loads of fun. It was so nice to have the chance to enjoy the type of close knit family gatherings that were the norm of my childhood there in CA. The ones that I'm now realizing I've so desperately missed. And Sunday was pretty much spent flying back home. The goodbyes were unexpectedly hard, especially for Em, and we both were left feeling that it was over way too soon.

There was so much more of course, but I can't possibly write it all down, in this one post. Like how Em was made famous on her first ever flight on JetBlue (let's just say, it's good to have connections!), or what it was like seeing my, now fully grown and simply gorgeous stepsisters and cousins (good lord, where has the time gone?) And of course, my beloved Aunt Sandy who's become such an integral part of my online life here in recent months. But I'm sure more will come (along with more pics as well) as I fondly recall one of the very best, and most desperately needed and appreciated experiences I've had in such a very long time. It's weird to be back, but we're settling in, and enduring the godforsaken heat- ug! Now, I just hope to get back to more regular posting, as I have sooooo much other juicy stuff to talk about! But for now, all that'll have to wait, or I just may never get this damn thing finished!

I'm baaaaaack!

Whew, what a fantastic trip! Just a quick update to let all who are wondering that we are home, safe and sound. Here's a teaser of what's yet to come:

No guarantees on just when "what's yet to come" will be exactly as I am currently in the throws of fending off church ladies with all my might and last remaining shreds of patience. Just a note; jet lag and bible thumpers simply do not mix. Gee, ya think? ;D Plus, I'm in mourning. Yup, for the cool breezes, lack of humidity, and striking crisp blue skies (after the fog has burnt off that is) of the beautiful California Bay Area. Ahhhhh, I tried to soak it in as much as possible, but upon exiting the airport here in AR, well... reality and the oppressive heat and humidity came crashing back in- ug. Along with real life. What? Exercise, healthy eating? Oh yeah, there's thaaaaat. Hey, vacation calories don't count, right?? Oh well, all good things must come to an end (sniff, sniff).

Anyway, like I said, more to come. But for now, the church ladies await!