Okay, time to change gears (although inside pics are still to come, I promise!). Y’all know how I’ve always said that there isn’t really anything that I want to be when I grow up? No real passion for something that I wish I could make a living doing? I mean, I’ve toyed with different ideas (L&D nurse, a small business venture involving the maternity field, writing, etc.) but I’ve never had the gumption to follow through on anything. Well, I guess its time to follow through on something cuz I think I’ve figured out what I want to be when I grow up, but it’s gonna mean going back to school to do it. Now don’t get me wrong, I feel so lucky to have the opportunity to work from home right now, especially while Em is young, but I know I can’t do this forever. My two work-from-home jobs, while the pay is adequate, are unbelievably mind numbing, unfulfilling, and totally dead end. And now that I finally have a real future to look forward to, well, I guess I’ve acquired this burning desire to actually make something of it. Anyway, I’ve known for a while now that I want to help people in some capacity, although how, I was never quite sure. But given my experiences and realizations over the last few years, I’ve come to the conclusion that my purpose would best be served as a child/family advocate. So I’ve decided that I want to be a social worker, specifically a family services or child welfare agent, which requires at least a BA. I know that it’s a hard job with crappy hours and not so great pay, and I’m definitely worried about my ability to handle the stresses and heartache that are sure to come with it, but I also know that this is something I have to do. Ever since the idea came to me, I haven’t been able to put it out of my head, much as I’ve tried. See, I have it pretty darn easy right now. Nothing to challenge me or make me work for aside from setting up house, paying the bills, and trying to raise a precocious little girl into a strong and independent young woman. And for much of my life that was all I needed, always being the type to do just enough to get by. But to be quite honest, bare minimum just ain’t cuttin’ it for me anymore. I need more, and not just in the sense of more financial security and stability like a degree would afford, but more fulfillment in general. I need to do what I can to help others, especially those who can’t help themselves. To save a child, to help a family, to make a difference somehow. You see? I just have to now, how could I not? So, that brings me to the logistics of it all. I have to find out if going back to school would even be possible right now financially and time-wise, so I plan to set up an appointment at the local college to see what my options are, and then take it from there. And I figure that by the time I actually finish a four-year degree, Em would be old enough to handle the irregular hours that this job requires. So, there ya have it, a plan, something to work for. I feel like I’m in this mode of line ‘em up and knock ‘em down right now, and I gotta say, I like it. I remember writing how endless the possibilities seemed a year ago, right after the great escape, but I don’t think I really appreciated just how true that statement was. I really can do almost anything now, and with the will and a way, the possibilities truly are endless.

More pics, just cuz

Em happily and peacefully reading on a blanket in our own backyard and little Bella basking in the glorious sunshine streaming through one of many tall windows. Doesn't get much better than that, now does it?

House Pics... FINALLY!!

See? I told ya I'd post some pics... eventaully. ;D Please pay no attention to the horrid faux well in front (I call it the outhouse) as it will NOT be there long, ICK! And we've started work on the badly overgrown landscaping but it is going to be a big job so we're just taking it one step at a time. Em and I are totally loving the rose bush, which has just decided to sprout up a whole swell of new buds, and we have grand visions of LOTS of bright, beautiful flowers and plush green grass to replace all the weeds and dirt. Hmmm, me? Looking forward to gardening? Whodathunkit? Anyway, here it is, we're finally here (moved in weekend before last 5/12) but only just signed the papers to make it offically mine on Monday 5/21. Super long story that I am soooo over so I won't even bother for now. Point is, it's mine, all mine (and the bank's)!! We're home, YAY!!

Are we there yet???

Oh dear lord, what a flippin’ ordeal this house buying business has been! Y’know what I really despise? Coming to the disturbing realization of just how vulnerable my sometimes-foolish naiveté can leave me. Honestly, had I known what I was getting myself into; I probably never would have bothered. But I simply didn’t do my research and quite frankly, I was completely unprepared for what all buying a home would entail. However… the last hoop has successfully been hurdled and I am, without a doubt, finally going to close on and move into my own home this weekend. But not without the very greatly appreciated help of my wonderful parents who have come to the rescue… once again. ;D What on earth would I do without them? I’ll spare you all of the gory details of the last two month’s headaches and frustrations simply because I haven’t the time or inclination to rehash the B.S. Let’s just say that my most formidable stumbling blocks have been due to my chaotic financial history with Bub and my current contract employment status with the church ladies. Apparently underwriters aren’t too keen on lowly self-employed individuals trying to obtain home mortgage loans, especially if they don’t have any recent tax records to show for. Hmmmm, oh yeah, well there’s that… DOH! Anyway, I promise that pics are still forthcoming, no really, I swear! And hopefully a more thorough update when time and patience allows.

BTW, did y'all notice that we've passed the one-year anniversary of my great escape? April 21, 2006, it's amazing how drastically things can change in so little time, huh? :D